To Kindle or not to Kindle?

As anyone who follows this blog knows, I am a book fanatic. So it was inevitable that the issue of Kindle/e-book readers vs. traditional paperbacks would eventually come my way. And while it’s not necessarily a huge problem for me, I was curious as to what other people think – aka, you guys! ๐Ÿ™‚

So many bookstores in my small hometown and even in here in the city have gone out of business recently. From Atlantic Books to Borders to little independent bookstores, I always get sad when I hear of another bookstore that has been forced to shut its doors. While it may or may not be entirely due to the rise of e-books can be debated forever. But I’m sure the e-books played some role. I’m guilty of it myself. I swore I would never get an e-reader and remain faithful to my beloved paperbacks – because who doesn’t love turning the pages of a real book? And hello, bookshelves were made to be filled. But two years ago, my dad surprised me with a Kindle for my birthday. And I’m both sad and happy to say I haven’t really looked back since.

I was excited for the Kindle because of the possibilities it brought with it. My favorite thing about the device is not having to wait for a year or more for the paperback version of a book to come out. Countless times, I’ve been in a bookstore and put down a book because it was a hardback, and therefore more expensive. Now, that problem is gone. So far, I have not purchased a new book on the Kindle above $13. And that’s at the very maximum.ย  Most are $10 or under. All of a sudden, new books are at my fingertips, and it is amazing.

Have I still bought a paperback now and then? Of course. How could I not? Sometimes, I can’t resist a particularly enticing paperback. Other times, I’ve borrowed a book from a library and loved it so much that I go find it in the bookstore on purpose, because I have to have a real copy in my hands.

Amazon also has a ridiculous wealth of books available on Kindle. It’s gross, really, how much you can find with the click of a button. Especially when you’re stuck inside because of the weather. Still, I do hold out hope that bookstores do continue, because that’s where I fell in love with books in the first place. Bookstores are wonderful places. And who doesn’t want a library like the one in the Swan Princess? With the ladder that lets you glide from one end to the other? Or the library in Beast’s castle? ๐Ÿ˜›

So I’m curious to hear other thoughts on this topic, just because it’s become really prevalent lately. Kindle? Paperback? Both? Neither?

Beautiful cover

I stumbled across this today thanks to a link on a friend’s Facebook page, and I really can’t get enough. So I felt like I should share it with people and hope that it spreads. Boyce Avenue, a band I hadn’t heard of until now, did a gorgeous cover of Fun’s We Are Young. While this song has been overplayed tremendously on the radio, I still can’t help but like it or get it stuck in my head. And thankfully, because of bands like Boyce Avenue, there are some beautiful covers out there that help change the song just a little to make it fresh again. This acoustic cover in particular is just lovely to listen to – no yelling or anything. Just a really pretty voice singing a good song. This is one of the wonderful things about living in such a technological age. While there are definitely some downsides to it, there are also really cool things like being able to access so many different song covers and talented people. I love song covers. Some of my favorite songs are covers. So thanks to this link, I find myself looking for these guys on iTunes and previewing their album, too. Pretty sweet deal for them and me ๐Ÿ™‚

Why do you mess with me so?

There might not be anything worse than having a dissatisfying ending to a trilogy or series. Yes, I know, what a problem. I know there are worse things out there, but frankly in my little bubble, this takes the cake. I have been waiting two years for the ending to this trilogy. Two years. I should have known. The last time this happened, my heart was broken in so many pieces, I had a hard time trusting series for a while. And yet, here I am again, played for a fool. There is something very wrong with authors who just fuck with your mind for the hell of it. I understand wanting to be suspenseful, different, and not-so-predictable. But when doing all those things means going batshit crazy and seriously screwing up a series and its characters? Why? WHY?!?!?!?

I am a freak about books. I obsess, I get way too attached, blah blah blah. So don’t fuck with me and my books. They are precious to me. But thank god I have a Kindle and can return this book. Because I want my money back. I did not go through the first two books – the first, brilliant, book especially – to be let down in such a way. Ask my roommate. I was yelling and insisting there had to be more. But there wasn’t. From everywhere I can find online, this is the “conclusion” to a series. And what a let down. I don’t want to really talk about what the book was or the story. I am just so ridiculously pissed off at this waste of my time. And it’s a shame, too. Because the book was doing so well. It was really good, and then 3/4 of the way through, everything went to hell. It’s always that last 1/4, thatย  you never see coming. Or that maybe you do see, but like to believe can be overcome. Nope. All that this book ended with was sorrow and anger – and not just for me. It seemed the main character had pretty much given up hope as well. Everything was lost. And she didn’t come out of it a better person. Not by far. So what was the point of that?

So disappointed. I really hoped that the author could come up with something more clever. She had so much potential, especially from the first two books. And then, in the last few pages of this one, everything just imploded. And there was just some really depressing shit everywhere. I really can’t get over it. It’s upsetting. And now, I just want to sleep and pretend it never happened. Which is really the last thing I ever hoped to say about this book.

Too many thoughts

So many things have happened in the past month, and yet I still find myself more restless and lost than ever. So here’s hoping a post can at least get all my thoughts assembled before I scream them to the world instead.

-My two best friends/roommates and I finally moved to our new apartment, which was blessedly closer to campus and seemed to be great. While it is and will be amazing one day, we are quickly learning that it is a major work in progress. It’s fun to fix up a place and make it yours, for sure. But I know there are days where one of my roommates wishes she didn’t have to be the live-in repairman/mechanic/electrician, too. Because she’s been a godsend helping us fix things, despite being exhausted from work. and yet there seems to be a never ending list of things to do. To top it off, a little shit mouse is having a blast in our kitchen and won’t just die in our traps. He’s now scared each of my roomies in the middle of the night whilst chowing down. Our food is/was securely wrapped, or so I thought. But damn this mouse.

I meanwhile am still unemployed and pretty much going crazy. Don’t get me wrong, after 4 years of college – with more coming – I know a break is good. But I had it. For a month. With my best friend. Being on a “break” alone while everyone else is busy sucks, though. And sitting in the apartment alone with the aforementioned mouse and added noises is enough to make me go crazy. I did the long walks every day but all they did was give me new scenery for my never ending stream of thoughts.

I have been applying to jobs left and right. Internships, LinkedIn, monster. All of it. Sometimes I get a response, and with that comes hope. And then, time after time, has been the defeat that comes with finding out I was thisclose but didn’t make the cut. So now I find myself belatedly looking for any summer job that will occupy my time and make my brain feel active again. It’s also very demoralizing. I wonder how much things have changed in a year that I would feel so unqualified for so many jobs. I wonder if it’s me or if things really are that hard in the job market, or both. I just don’t know.

I’ve lost count of how many books I’ve read in my time off, and as much as I love them, they’re ultimately just a temporary escape from my life. When each book ends, I’m reminded of my reality, but lately it frustrates me so much that I just want to be lost in another book.

All this lovely time off has also given me the chance to do my loan exit interviews with my parents. I’m lucky, I recognize that. I have wonderful loving parents who are helping me with this mess of loans. But when I see the numbers I finally really see and wonder if I really want to keep adding to this, with loans that will be even bigger if I ever make it to med school. I knew it would be a lot when I started this journey- but sometimes things don’t quite hit you until you see the numbers. I also have different worries now, worries that extend to years I cant see yet. I think about family and if i really want to put such a strain on myself, my parents, and any kid I may have. I’m sure if I was occupied or still in classes I wouldn’t be as worried, only because my mind would be busy worried about other daily things. I’m 21. I don’t know how normal it is to worry about this stuff, but it’s all floating in my head because frankly I have no better use of my time.

I hope I find something soon.